Good morning and happy Friday!
Before I get into today’s musing – a few updates!
Reminder every Thursday at 9:00 am EST I’ll be streaming live in our Facebook Group – the Thursday Club Insiders.
Our In person Mastermind intensive originally scheduled for the Maldives will now be held in the Caribbean. Jenn and I learned that the Maldives Muslim culture is very intolerant to outsiders and in fact you could be jailed if you are gay or found with literature that does not align with the Koran. I’m not willing to take chances and I surely don’t want to deny someone from coming because they don’t fit the “Maldives Model”. Jenn is in her glory because her task is to find the spot! We hope to have a decision by April 1. Good news is the cost will be significantly less expensive as far as travel and lodging. So I guess things happen for a reason!
Ok – onto today’s lesson in Resilience. In my eyes there are 7 layers or core principles when it comes to building one’s resilience that ultimately leads to being more confident. Or as I mentioned last week – it’s chicken and egg time. Some people need resilience to build confidence, others need confidence to build resilience.
What helps you build Resilience
- Believe in your Ability to Deal. This surely goes back to having self-belief and confidence. Remember that nothing lasts forever – good or bad and this too shall pass. When faced with a challenge – take a deep breath and literally tell yourself “I’ve got this”. It often helps to remember other challenging things you’ve overcome to put things in perspective. You MUST face and push through some hard stuff – it’s what my friend Robin lovingly calls getting some good scar tissue.
- Get your Tribe. Hello Thursday Group and connect with Cindy! When you are going through something tough, or even something new – find people who can support you and lift you up and 100% find people who have been there before you. No need to reinvent wheels! When you find your tribe, you will be empowered.
- SHARE! This goes back to 2. Once you find your tribe share your thoughts, your ideas, your FEELINGS. Growth requires vulnerability and no it’s not a sign of weakness to say you don’t understand, you don’t know, you are confused, you are lost – that’s what your tribe is for. The no judgement zone. If you are being judged – they aren’t your tribe.
- Lift up others. Part of the whole growth process and building resiliency is constantly moving up the ladder – people will pull you up and you need to reach down and pull others up. The sense of helping others empowers you because you’ve reached a milestone where you CAN share and help! You feel bolder and accomplished – keep going because you are GROWING!
- Be positive. I know this isn’t always easy but you need to really work on finding the sunshine. When the shit hits the fan and you are faced with something hard, go to your happy place and step back like you are looking down at your life and the current situation. What is the lesson, where is the sunshine? The secret is to NOT get wrapped up in the drama and dwell on the negative. It’s ok to be sad – but watch how long you are in that state.
- Don’t be a victim. When you become a victim you are letting the aggressor the “mean girls” win the battle. Rise above and let go of the victim mentality. This is also about being resourceful versus looking for resources. Stop saying I can’t because of X or Y, say I can because of A or B. Yes, you need to accept the reality of your situation, but that doesn’t mean you need to be a victim of it.
- Find Purpose and Meaning. Resilient people focus on the bigger purpose, the meaning of life and are often quite spiritual. They are less materialistic and don’t sweat the little things. This is the deep part of the journey – the soul searching part and is by far the most rewarding. Connect with your inner self. It’s one of the big reasons I’m going on my sabbatical and working on my book – and hell, it’s why I have the Thursday Club. It’s part of my purpose.
Write these in your own words in a journal. When you are struggling – refer back to them.
Have an awesome weekend!
Cheers!
CD